Survivor of Bullying On the Kansas Prairies

by Rosalea Hostetler
(Harper, KS)

You know how you sometimes have an "eureka" moment in life, when
you "finally get it"? Recently I had that moment when it finally
sunk in that the reason my journey for the past 40 years has been
so hard in Harper County Kansas has been the incessant bullying
and the ultimate betrayals. It took me my entire life to finally
truly understand that I have been a target, and of the brutal
impact Harper County bullies have had on my life, my health and on
the 501(c) (3) nonprofit The Balmer Fund that I established in
1994 to preserve the history, art & culture of the prairies for
future generations. Tragically, this abuse of power has also
nearly obliterated our small town. It is not Wal-Mart as locals
think--rather, it is the abuses bestowed by bullies in
"leadership" on the good people, the talented people who do not
have the energy or knowledge to fight such rotten apples.

Now that I truly understand what I've endured for forty years at
the mercy of bullies, I am not taking it any more. Our monthly
grassroots journal, Prairie Connection, will make every effort to
educate the public over the next several issues as removing the
bullies from power is the only way for our small towns to survive.
Hoping to rebuild our historic downtown located only 40 minutes
southwest of Wichita, KS will be my sweet revenge for the years of
abuses. I've been lied to, harassed, vandalized, boycotted,
shunned, ostracized, ripped-off, put in jail and betrayed time
and again by folks I trusted—you name it, it's happened to me in
some form or another. Two nights ago someone left a box of feces
outside my office door. Outsiders often ask how I've endured—I
honestly do not know except I have always believed that "Good Will
Prevail."

As I study bullying and betrayal I have come to understand what
it is and what all it entails. It is an educational process. Few
people I know grasped the concept 40 years ago or even 20 years
ago. Ten years ago there was an awakening but it was still hazy.
But more people are learning all the time the way bullying invades
schools, the workplace--and now I include our small towns on the
prairies. It causes the ultimate betrayal to our lives, it causes
suicides, physical and mental illness, loss of motivation, fear,
stress, apathy and indifference and often overt substance abuse.

Years ago our Kansas State Attorney General set up small towns to
operate on their own; there are so many it would be impossible to
monitor them all. It was expected that there would be trust and
truth in these elected officials but alas, through the decades the
municipal, county and law enforcement positions have become
nothing more than brutal positions of power for weak people who
lack integrity to wield the control, sometimes in the most
inhumane ways. Usually, these are the people who have stayed
behind in a small town, do not have much in the way of higher
education, and find little fulfillment in their lives except to
abuse power and control.

I cringe to think of the lives these bullies in power have ruined.
Worst of all, they have beat down the regular citizen with fear
and intimidation, to the point they won't stand up or speak up to
these ruthless smart alecks. Rather, the citizens sit meekly and
watch as the gang brutalizes those who fight for their rights.
Rather than gathering as a group to run against or vote these
people out of power, the Silent Majority only allows them to
fester and grow more abusive with each new election and each new
generation.

Because I've traveled so many miles a year across the prairies as
a volunteer since 1994, I have seen a lot. The small towns with
bullies in leadership positions are withering and will eventually
disappear. Only the spare handful that have honest leaders with
integrity and the best interest of the citizens at heart are
surviving--and there aren't very many.

Small town bullies work in gangs or mobs. They do not have the
courage to attack alone. They thrive on attacking one person
standing alone. It apparently gives them a real ego surge, much
like a pack of animals after a single prey.

Because I have stood up to the bullies, told the truth and stayed
the course, I have lost virtually everything once important in my
life: my Mennonite church, my family ties, two husbands (also
bullies) and school chum friendships. For years I was taunted as
"the problem." (I cried a lot in those days.) I've lost so much in
my life that there is nothing left to lose so now I am ready to
speak up wherever I can to tell the world about the horrors of
small town bullies with the hopes of bringing Hope to our small
prairie towns, and preserving what is left.

I invite everyone to view You Tube: Bullying On the Prairies, to
help you comprehend the pain and the loss, and how I am cling to
Hope for a brighter tomorrow. Forty years is a long time to pursue
a dream you believe in. Some call me "crazy." No, I'm not—I'm a
Survivor with a Dream. And I never give up.

/Rosalea Hostetler/